Advertisement
Article ThumbMike’s ‘Bottom of the Barrel’ Xmas Xtravaganza

If you could only see your face right now (take a selfie and after you wallow in the horror of your expression, send me a copy). You turned to this page, just knowing that I had run out of Christmas carols to parody and that – for once! – your holiday season wouldn’t be ruined by these tunes – and my insipid lyrics to them – running like an out of control Cuisinart in your brain. Well, turn on the blender, kids, ’cause here we go again.

As usual, I disavow any connection to the rest of this column. Not only was I not conscious when I wrote it (and who says I did, huh?), you can’t prove that 1) I have a computer, 2) I know how to use it, and 3) I know how to speak Christmas. That’s what I call an air tight case.
Now you’ll excuse me while I wipe my hard drive clean. Sing!


Article ThumbMike’s “Bargain Basement”  Holiday Hort Sing Along

People ask me why, year after inexplicable year, I continue to crank out these bizarre little lyrics for the holidays. Normally, I nod and smile and ignore the question. But when it’s your shrink who is pleading for an answer, uh … let’s just say that I said I would think it over, but, gee, I’m on deadline and I’ll talk to you next week.

I’m not sure that counts as an answer. I’ll let you know next year.


categories

Lincoln Park Zoo Advertisement

popular

Article Thumbnail
Features
Let It Rain

Rain gardens are hot news, but are they pretty? Here are some examples that take the concept beyond mere buzz words.


Article Thumbnail
Features
From the Inside Out

Good design and careful planning filled this modest backyard space with a garden that meets the needs of adults and children.


Article Thumbnail
Columns
Beyond Red and Green

It’s great to be traditional, but sometimes we’d like to do a variation on the familiar theme


Article Thumbnail
Blog
Rain, Rain Go Away!

Our official National Weather Service rain gauge clocked in with 3.60 inches of rain at 7 a.m. this morning. And more is ...


Article Thumbnail
Blog
Gardening for Your Taste Buds

In a few weeks, we can start planting tomatoes and peppers as well as sowing seeds of squash, eggplant, beans and other ...


questions

Which flowers can we plant that the bunnies won’t eat? My pansies and marigolds are all eaten.

My Siberian iris ‘Gracilis’ plants have only one bloom per clump. I have five 3 to 5 year-old clumps that are 8 to 10 inches wide. They do not appear to be crowded. All are planted in a moist area. Why is there only one bloom per clump?

Miniature gardening is the rage. What enchanting miniature plants work well in a shaded area?

ChicagolandGardening Advertisement